One Thing at a Time

When I was much younger I would fill notebooks with unrealistic goals and aspirations. Repeatedly I wrote out very detailed plans to overhaul my entire life. I was going to get in shape, eat healthier, have better relationships, organize everything, learn new things, become more spiritual, run faster, jump higher and make it all happen at once.

I didn’t make it much farther than the notebook page most of the time. Not because I lacked will power or motivation. Not because I was lazy. I failed because I was intent on completing the entire painting in one stroke. I wanted the finished, perfect product in less time than was possible.

I know I’m not alone in this desire, as much of the advertising I see is aimed in exactly that direction. We even do it with our dogs. We think about training and start imagining the perfect, finished product. Despite our planning process, the reality of the distance between where we are and where we want to be can destroy even the best of intentions.

Today I’m a lot easier on myself. I try to take smaller steps and focus on one or two things at a time. Maybe I’ll improve my diet this week and add some exercise next week. Maybe I’ll make an effort to spend at least one hour with a friend this week instead of trying to spend an hour with every one of my friends. You see what I’m getting at here?

It is entirely possible to reach that ultimate goal! I’m not saying that the finished product is beyond reach. However, you may have to work on nothing but door manners this week and start working on a better stay later on. You might have to focus all your energy on loose leash walking while managing door manners for now. It’s okay!

You and your dog will have more fun and enjoy the thrill of success if you concentrate on one skill at a time. Things like sit, down, stand and eye contact can be worked into every training situation. But you might have to make a choice between sitting when greeting strangers and barking.

If you and your dog can work on more than one issue without getting frustrated and agitated…go for it! But if no one is having any fun, progress is not being made and you start to dread the training (and possibly the dog) altogether, it’s time to zoom in on one thing or the other.

Don’t worry…the other issue (much like the dishes) will still be there.

All Aboard!

If you hire me as a trainer you can expect some questions to be asked about your human family. I’m going to want to know who lives in the home, how much time they spend with the dog(s) and what kind of relationship they have with the dog.

If you tell me that the rest of your family isn’t interested in training the dog, or that you want to use hands-off training while your partner refuses to walk your dog without a prong collar, we have a major problem!

Imagine you are one of two parents with a child. You have decided that the child cannot watch television. Your partner doesn’t share your viewpoint and allows the child to watch television. In this case, the child is going to continue to watch television and even develop a stronger habit of watching television. The child’s behavior can’t change until your conflict with your spouse is resolved.

This happens with dog training all the time. You can spend plenty of money on a trainer, learn all the best techniques to teach your dog to sit politely for petting, practice every single day and still fail because someone else in your household is reinforcing your dog for jumping up. This IS a failure in training, but not a failure of the methods or the trainer.

This is one of the reasons that I avoid working with just one family member. I want the whole family there so I can get a feel for who is on board for what. A good trainer can find ways to motivate the family to agree on a training plan, but some issues have to be worked out between the family.

One of the worst situations is when one family member calls a trainer saying that the dog must be trained because another family member is threatening to “get rid of” the dog. If the threatening family member is willing to join in the training then this can be a workable situation. If the threatening family member really just doesn’t want the dog they may sabotage any training efforts so that the dog fails and can be removed from the home.

So, before you call a trainer, take a look at your family dynamics. Is there anyone who is going to stand in the way of training? Is there anything you can do to remedy that situation? Is everyone on board as to what issues should be addressed and what issues they don’t mind living with? A family meeting about the dog might be a good place to start.

A trainer is not a family counselor and should not be expected to come in and decide for you who is right and who is wrong. Really, that’s IS what some people want me to do. They call me in hoping that I will tell their partner that they are doing it all wrong and make them do it differently. I can’t do that! What is right or wrong depends on what you want/expect from your dog. If each family member has a different expectation then everyone might be doing just the right thing to get the dog that they want.

What I can do is to help your family sort through differing expectations and come up with compromises, realistic goals and ways to work together for a dog that makes everyone happy. This requires that the entire family is willing to sit down with a trainer, talk about what they want and join in on the training.

You Don’t Have to Say Hello

There seems to be some kind of compulsion in our society to have dogs who don’t know each other greet one another on leash when out in public.  Am I the only one who finds this a bit weird?

If you know anything about me, you know that I’m a hard-core proponent of canine socialization.  However, I don’t quite understand why my dogs would need to greet any canine they meet on the street. 

As a trainer, I happen to know that many dogs who are out and about probably shouldn’t be.  I know how common it is for owners of reactive/aggressive dogs to be in denial.  Dogs who have bitten people and other dogs can still be walking down the street, at the pet store or in the park with their owners.

I have the advantage of enough education and experience to read dogs more effectively than the average owner, so I feel pretty confident in knowing which dogs I should absolutely avoid.  But for most of my clients the prospect of allowing their dog to greet a strange dog is a hold your breath, cross your fingers, crap shoot.

Another problem is that so many dogs have not been taught how to greet other dogs appropriately.  To add to that issue, many dog owners don’t understand normal, appropriate dog behavior.  Time and again I’ve seen a friendly yet highly inappropriate dog greet another dog in a rude (but friendly) manner.  When the dog being greeted gives a very appropriate and much warranted correction, he is deemed mean or aggressive.  It’s all backwards!

My strong preference is for dogs who are out on walks to learn that other dogs are of no consequence.  My perfect world would have dog owners waving to each other and saying hello with no response from the dogs. 

I would love to see dogs having a rich social life through well-run daycare, back yard play groups or safe dog parks so that walking with their owners could simply be about walking with their owners.

Choices in Training Programs

When it comes to training dogs I am a proponent of positive methods that exclude fear, force, intimidation and pain.  How your dog gets that dog-friendly, effective training is up to you!  Not everyone has a schedule that allows them to attend a weekly class and do their homework.  Lots of people can’t afford private training and need to do all the work themselves.  Regardless of your situation, there is a way to get the quality dog training that your dog requires.

Do It Yourself:  If you are willing to put in the time and effort, you can train your dog completely on your own with fantastic results.  This is the most time-consuming way to go, but it can be done with very little to no financial investment. 

The first step in doing it yourself is to read, read and read some more of the highest quality, most up to date information on dog training.  Skip the celebrity trainers and snake oil salesman!  I would suggest you go to the true experts like Ian Dunbar, Patricia McConnell and Jean Donaldson…to name a few.  You can find a great suggested reading list at Dog Wise.  You can read blogs, watch videos and use the Digital Training Textbook at Dog Star Daily for even more great training advice.

You will need to work with your dog every day and be ready to search for answers when things aren’t going the way you’d planned.  If you’re the type of person who loves to solve problems, learn, research and experiment, this is the way for you to train your dog!

Group Classes:  Attending a group class with a Certified Pet Dog Trainer still requires that you do all the dog training yourself, but you won’t have to do all the research.  Instead, you will be guided and given the answers to your questions.  A good trainer will provide the information in a fun, positive manner and keep you motivated from week to week.

It is important to note that group classes are generally for dog-friendly, people-dogs.  If your dog is not comfortable in a group setting, then group classes could make the situation even worse.

Don’t confuse class attendance with training your dog!  You go to class to learn how to train your dog at home.  Your dog won’t learn everything it needs to know in one hour per week.  You will have to work on what you learn in class at home, every day.

Private Training:  When you hire a Certified Pet Dog Trainer to work with you on an individual basis, you are basically hiring a personal training coach.  The trainer will come up with a plan for you and your dog, show you exactly what to do, coach you, motivate you and follow-up with you on a regular basis. 

While the trainer will surely do some of the training during your sessions, it will be up to you to follow through between sessions.  No matter how good the trainer, a client who refuses to do their part of the work will always impede success.

Private training can seem expensive, but remember that you are getting one-on-one coaching from someone who has already done a huge amount of research and real-world training.  This means that you will get the information you need quickly and easily so you can apply it immediately.  That will save you tons of time and energy, which makes it well worth the investment in a qualified dog trainer.

Board & Train:  While many trainers scoff at board & train programs, they happen to be one of my favorite options if they’re done well.  Your dog will live with the trainer and receive direct, daily training from the professional.  In other words, the trainer will do the work for you.

I love this option because instead of teaching the client to teach the dog, I simply teach the dog.  Results are much quicker with a greatly reduced margin of error.  Any experienced Certified Pet Dog Trainer can teach a dog more in a day than a novice dog owner could teach a dog in a week!

Why do some trainers not like the idea?  The theory is that without the daily training the dog and owner will miss out on relationship building experiences.  It is true that training creates a bond.  It is true that owners gain a certain appreciation for their dogs through training.

However, it is also true that many owners get very frustrated with training their dog and that frustration can ruin the dog and owner relationship.  This is especially true for those dog owners with very busy schedules or who have difficulty learning how to train.

In my experience, having a dog who is well-behaved allows the owner to spend quality time with their dog which builds a better relationship than they would have had otherwise.  Being relieved from the pressure of the daily training and only being responsible for maintaining already taught behaviors can save an otherwise doomed relationship!

Board & train is the most expensive option, but also the easiest for the owner.  A good program will include several follow-up sessions to help the owner maintain trained behaviors. 

All Options:  Regardless of the option you choose, it is absolutely necessary for you to choose the very best trainer in your area.  How do you know who is the best?  Well, you shop around!  Visit a class before you register, ask for references, ask LOTS of questions and make sure that the trainer you hire is a Certified Pet Dog Trainer. 

The more you know about your goals and how you would like your dog trained, the easier it will be to choose the trainer that fits.  If you don’t want anyone reprimanding your dog with a choke chain, don’t be afraid to ask a trainer if they use them.  If you are concerned about your dog being dependent on treats in order to behave, ask the trainer how they will transition the dog away from food treats and how soon that will happen. 

Remember, you are paying for a service and you have every right to know what is going to happen to your dog.  If it doesn’t feel right, it probably isn’t.

Success by Association

 

What makes you like stuff?  If you like gardening, what is it that gives you that happy feeling when you think about doing it?  On the other hand, if you hate gardening, what causes that negative feeling?  Why do most of us feel anxious when we see the flashing lights of a police car pulling us over?  Why do some people bristle at the sound of a spouse saying, “Honey, can you come here a minute?”

For each of these situations we have built associations based on past experiences.  How we feel about each scenario depends on previous outcomes.  I love to garden and watch things grow.  I spent many years without a garden of my own.  Now that I have acres of my own land, I think about gardening nearly all the time!  When I have the time to do it, I am at my happiest.  I view it as playing in the dirt!

My husband spent his childhood on an acreage pulling weeds.  That was the chore he hated the most, was given most often and seemed to be the hardest for him to do.  He shares my joy in planting new things around the house, but the idea of weeding and upkeep turns his stomach.  Are you seeing the difference in associations and how they affect attitude?

I don’t know about you, but even if I absolutely KNOW that I’ve done nothing wrong, the sight of flashing lights from a police car in my rearview mirror will get my stomach churning, increase my breathing and get me a bit flustered.  I’m in trouble.  I suppose this is because of the few times I’ve had experiences with the police, I have ended up having to pay money for a ticket. 

If the police spent a year pulling people over to give them a piece of cheesecake, chocolate or some cash, we might see some big changes in our emotional reaction to being pulled over!

I’m guessing you get this by now…so let’s move on to dogs.  Let’s say your dog really hates car rides.  You put on the leash, start walking to the car, and your dog stops dead in his tracks.  He doesn’t want to get into that car…no way, no how!

It could be that he got car sick at one time, got scared or somehow had a bad experience in the car.  Now the car represents that bad feeling.  It really doesn’t matter what caused the problem in the first place.  What matters is that we change this conditioned emotional response to car rides.

How do we do that?  Easy!  We simply provide a more positive outcome and associate that with the car and car rides.  We will have to break it down a bit and build the association piece by piece.  For example, perhaps we’ll walk the dog half way to the car, or just before the point where he would react, give him a nice piece of chicken or cheese, go back in the house and repeat a little later.

After we’ve done this a few times, maybe we can walk all the way to the car, give a good treat, then go for a walk around the block.  When we arrive back home, we can stop by the car, have a treat and some petting, then go in the house.

The next day our dog might be ready to go to the car, have you open the door and have a treat in front of the open door.  If things are going well, maybe you can toss a treat onto the seat, let your dog get it, then let him jump back out.  You see how we’re taking little steps and building the association?

The reason we do this is because your dog is getting anxious and upset long before he ever gets to the car.  As soon as he figures out that you’re going toward the car, his anxiety will start ramping up.  This means that by the time your dog is in the car he’s over the top with upset!

So, we have to start changing those early feelings first and move toward a dog who can get in the car with no anxiety.  Only then will we start sitting in the car, turn on the engine, give treats, turn off the car and repeat.  Eventually there will be a drive down the street, around the block and so on.

This can all happen in a matter of days or weeks.  It’s really up to the dog and just how upset he is over the trigger.  The important thing is that you go at the dog’s pace.  Pushing the dog through his fears often only serves to reinforce the equation of that = this.  If car rides = stress and you drag your dog kicking and barking to the car, forcing him into what he fears, then you have just proven that car rides = stress!

In some cases, this work of changing associations is very tricky.  When dealing with aggression issues or serious reactivity, it’s always best to work with a Certified Pet Dog Trainer.

Oh, I almost forgot my other example!  I said in the beginning of this post that some people bristle at the sound of their spouse saying, “Honey, can you come here a minute?”  For a lot of people, these words mean that they are going to be confronted about something or asked to help with something they’d rather not do. 

My husband does a lot of cooking…and he’s good at it!  When I hear, “Honey, can you come here a minute?” it usually means that I’m going to be offered a taste of something fantastic.  If not that, then he is calling me to look at something sweet or funny that our animals are doing.  Either way, coming when my husband calls is almost always a positive experience!

I’m sure you can see how that relates to dog training without further input from me.

Into the Twilight

 

I have done a lot of writing about taking care of puppies, getting through doggy adolescence and enjoying those golden years of well-behaved doggy adulthood.  What I have never discussed is the work involved in caring for an aging furry friend.

Snoozing next to me is a sweet, old Jack Russell Terrier.  He was creatively named Russell by my husband fifteen years ago.  Like most JRTs he was hell on paws for the first six or seven years of his life!  Bouncy, bold and constantly curious!

He started to slow down a bit when he turned eight.  Spending his time circling the Koi pond, looking like an old man searching for something he’d lost.  He was still bold, but less bouncy.  He was still curious, but not constantly.

I remember getting so annoyed with him several months back because he would stall just outside the back door and not come in.  I would stand right there saying, “COME ON, Russell!”  He would act like he just wasn’t sure if he really wanted to come in or not.  I was so frustrated!  I thought he was just getting more and more stubborn in his old age.

One morning, as I stood there waiting for him to cross the threshold of the back door, I reached down and grabbed him.  “There, now you’re in, you annoying old dog.”  I put him on the floor and watched him do something that absolutely broke my heart.  He took a few steps from where I had put him down and walked right into a wall.

I instantly started crying.  All those times he’d not come in through the open door, he couldn’t see it!  He wasn’t stubborn, he was blind.  I yelled for my husband and felt an overwhelming sense of panic.

After some observation, lots of tears, thinking that euthanization or natural death was just around the corner, my husband and I regained our senses.  Off to the vet we went.

That’s when we learned that being blind isn’t quite as big a deal to a dog as it might be to human.  They adjust, and they do it quickly and well.  We also learned that Russell was diabetic and also deaf.

It took several weeks to find the right dose of the right insulin to get Russell stabilized.  It took less time for him to learn to take small, careful steps so as not to run into things.  He got so good at finding his way around that even rediscovered the cat litter boxes!

Our new daily routine includes carrying Russell outside to use the bathroom every couple of hours.  We have to stay out there and follow him around so he doesn’t fall into the Koi pond or get stuck under the deck.  We give him two insulin shots per day and have to feed him separately from the other dogs.

Sometimes he gets lost in the house, so we have to keep track of where he is all the time.  We have to help him up on the bed, off the bed, on the couch and off the couch.  We have to watch that he doesn’t stumble into the other dogs while they’re sleeping, and constantly remind ourselves that he can’t hear what we’re saying.

We cried a lot of tears in the beginning, but have now come to a place where we can laugh when he barks at the dishwasher, demanding his dinner.  Instead of feeling loss when we watch him sleep most of the day, we now feel warm and grateful that he is enjoying a comfortable aging process.

I know that if we didn’t work from home it might not be possible for us to provide Russell with the care he receives.  Not everyone is willing or able to carry their dog out to potty every couple of hours.  Not everyone is as tolerant of old man accidents in the house.

Russell served many years as a best friend to my husband, a loving companion to me and my daughters, a mentor to our now eight year old Yorkie Poo, a playmate to our cat of the same age and a co-parent to two litters of kittens.  He has entertained, challenged and surprised us for 15 years.  He’s been a road trip navigator, camping buddy, mouse finder and class clown.  He has lived life to the fullest and served his duty as man’s best friend with honors.

Because of all he’s given us, we are honored to make his last few years as easy, comfortable and fulfilling as possible.  He is not a burden.  We are grateful for every day with him.  When I think of days to come when I won’t have to carry him outside and follow him around the yard, waiting for him to poop, I cry.  I will miss him so much.

Summer School

Every summer I see a dramatic decrease in training class enrollment.  I expect it and I totally understand it!  To be completely honest, I might even enjoy it a little bit.  I mean, I have a life, too.  I want to be camping, barbecuing and enjoying the sun just as much as anyone else.

That said, I do see amazing progress for the dogs and owners who make the extra effort to continue their training classes over the summer.  Remember, a dog’s developmental stages move far more quickly than a human’s!  A couple of months during a dog’s adolescence can be like a year or more in the life of a teenage human.  The pup who is four months old in June could be a lot different come August.

If a dog isn’t coming to class during the summer, I am always hopeful that she is accompanying her human family in all their activities.  Summertime provides a rich source of real life training and socialization!  Dogs who are supervised, guided and worked with during camping trips, barbecues and trips to the beach can learn very valuable life lessons!

Of course, my preference would be a little of both.  I would love to have dogs coming to class and participating in all of the family fun.  In any case, I will still be around come Fall.  I’ll be ready to hear all of my students’ great successes and eager to help them with any issue that have developed.

Here’s to summer!